It’s Not That I Don’t Believe in Marriage…

 …just not necessarily for me.  It’s kinda the same way I feel about veganism. Good for them, though.

But it’s important to note that February 29 is NOT Sadie Hawkins Day.

I’m laying low, just the same.

That Was NOT Good

So there I was driving along minding my business, when suddenly I heard a tremendous popping sound and the cab of my truck filled up with a foul smelling cloud. Apparently the guy at the UHaul store overfilled my propane cannister yesterday and the overflow valve burst a seal. I drove straight to my office with all the windows open and my head hanging out like a Golden Retriever.

Pay no attention to that loud hissing sound and rotten egg odor emanating from the culvert behind my warehouse.

I’m blaming it on the dog.

They’re Getting Along Famously

And yea the Nervous Nellie shall lay down with the Crazy Cockapoo, and there shall be peace in the valley.

When I Walk Under the Trees, Birds go “Cheep, Cheep, Cheap.”

RUABelle swears that I must have been reincarnated from someone who starved to death during the Great Depression.

In the past week she has caught me:

Using vice grips to get the last three squeezes out of a tooth paste tube.

Cutting a hole in the udder of a wine in a box to pour one last 1/8 of a glass.

Stuffing my pockets full of blue paper shop towels from a Texaco station.

Bringing home four packets of peanuts from a couple of Southwest flights despite the fact that I am allergic to them.

Checking out and returning the same random CD on consecutive days at the Metro library downtown so I can park for free.

I prefer to call it “frugal.”

What RUABelle and I Spent NYE Doing

How it made us feel.

Preventable Anguish

I know some people are allergic to the egg medium that flu vaccines come in, but not getting a $20 flu shot because you heard from somebody that it doesn’t cover every strain of influenza is like not wearing your seatbelt because you’re worried that it won’t protect you if you drive off a bridge and get stuck in 500 feet of water.  It’s worth the risk.

I don’t wish the agony of the flu on anyone, but the rest of us that have to cover for you when you’re out sick would like you to please go to Walgreen’s next year.

Whew, I Got Away With Another One

RUABelle and I have been happily unmarried for 17 1/2 years.

That’s a grand total of 70 birthdays, Christmases, Valentines and anniversaries.  Y’know, opportunities for her to expect a little blue box from Tiffanys.

I must be a tremendous disappointment.

It’s a Nashville Sports Fans Dream Night

Alright fanatics, you have your choice this evening of heading down to the Sommet Center to watch our beloved Nashville Predators take on their arch rivals the Detroit Red Wings. Hate `em or hate `em, the Motor City Maulers are head and shoulders above the rest of the NHL this year and may be one of the best hockey teams in the history of the league. Nashville is embroiled in a bitter back and forth battle for their playoff lives and could really use the support of about 17,000 screaming fans to balance out the five loudmouth PredWing fans who are still left over from their Saturn transfer from GM/Detroit to build crappy cars.

or…

You could point the Lexus over to Memorial Gym to watch the Vanderbilt Commodores men’s basketball team battle the Kentucky Wildcats. Vandy is finally starting to recapture their early-season form and this is the start of a critical four game home stand. Plus I have a lunch at the Palm bet on Vandy’s finishing better than fourth in the SEC East. As the Blue Mist descends on Nashville, the Commodores will need to play their best ball and depend on the Memorial Maniacs to rattle a talented young Kentucky team who is just starting to figure out how Billy Gillespie wants them to play.

So what am I doing tonight?

Going to a cooking class with RUABelle. I gotta start checking my calendar before I agree to this stuff…

The Hazards of Rental Car Radios

So I’m driving along I-17 in Arizona in my rental Prius jamming to a random song on a radio station which I found by seeking and stopping up and down the dial.  I didn’t know the station format.  I didn’t know the song.  I didn’t know the artist.

But I was dancing in my seat and banging my head to the beat.

“You know who that is, don’t you?” inquired the lovely RUABelle from the passenger seat.

“Nope, but it RAWKS!” I replied.

Miley Cyrus.

The horror.

Obama Earns Dominant Support of Nashville Audio Visual Club Alumni Association

MCB Poll

Of course, I voted for him twice.  I figured it was ok since he’s from the Chicago area…

Why the Giants Aren’t Like Giuliani

They found a way to make a strategy of waiting until the fourth quarter to start playing offense work for them.

And they found a way to beat somebody from Boston.