Merry Christmas from the Family

I’m allergic to nuts.  Not “projectile vomit anaphylactic shock thrashing on the floor” allergic.  More like “they make my throat itch and my lips turn numb” allergic.  But enough that I don’t like them and avoid them whenever possible.  And I’ve been like this for almost 42 years.

This year, like every year, I went to visit my mother at her house to exchange Christmas presents.  For the fourth year in a row, she gave me a zip-loc baggie full of salted pecans that she had charred in the oven.  Oh well, it’s the thought that counts.

Then she spent 20 minutes trying to sell me Xango juice. When I politely but firmly told her I was not a potential client and to please peddle her snake oil somewhere else, she tried to get me to sign up as a distributor instead.

It’s a Multi-Level Marketing Christmas!


5 Responses to Merry Christmas from the Family

  1. newscoma says:

    Wanna come see me.
    Going through the same thing with the paternal unit.

  2. Fishwreck says:

    Hahaha! Did you ask her if she wanted to buy some genuine framed art instead? It’s not even hanging in a flea market (yet). And there aren’t even any Velvet Elvises in the group.

  3. hilarious…. again.

    i so very get it. well maybe not the xango part – the day my mom tries to sell me anything… well that won’t happen but still, too too funny.

  4. Cube-Star says:

    Have you got a picture of said pecans? If so, this would make a great submission for Uh… thanks?

  5. Tom Wood says:

    Wonder how many xangoes they have to squeeze to get one bottle….

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