A Completely Unscientific Sociological Study

January 30, 2007

I figured rather than just bitching about how cold it was I’d actually do something constructive with the ten minutes I had to wait for the bus this morning. In that time span I’d guess about 450-500 cars passed me at the corner of 21st Avenue and Blair (now you know where to find me) heading eastbound.

Here’s what I observed:

4 cars ran the red light–“The light was yellow, officer. Okay, it was distinctly orange.”

About 50 of the commuters were drinking coffee out of travel mugs. 1 was drinking a “Thirsty-Two Ouncer” Miller Lite. Maybe he was on his way home from his 3rd shift job. In Green Hills? Funny, I don’t remember seeing a sock factory in the mall anywhere. I hope he’s not an air traffic controller or something.

About 1/4 of the travelers were smiling while they drove. I did my best to increase that number by smiling at the women who were driving by themselves. I know, cheesy/skeevy.

Only 12 guys were wearing ties.

None of them were smiling.

100% of people driving Mercedes or Lexuses (Lexi?) looked very happy with themselves.

Women talking on cellphones outnumbered men by a 10/1 ratio. But I did hypothesize that some of the men might have been wearing those Bluetooth earbud penis extensions and just listening to the other party talk when I observed them. Or maybe I counted them among the people I thought were crazy and talking animatedly to themselves. In that case, there were 8 of them.

I only saw 3 people smoking. Nashvillians must be preparing themselves for the coming of our new non-smoking overlords. (Read “Bredesen.”)

The 3 guys driving Hummers were dicks. I don’t have any empirical evidence of this. I just know it to be true.


12 Degrees…

January 29, 2007

…makes for a pretty crappy day for my bus to be twenty minutes late.

Yeah, I know it was a pretty stupid day for me to be riding the bus.

I’m sure I’ll have more to say when my testicles descend.